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Friday, May 26th, 2006
3:37 am - I, Caregiver
I'm going to be a nurse. I love it.

I love that I'm physically strong. No matter what, if a fat guy needs to be moved, they're going to be hoping for my farm working shoulders and pipefitter hands.

In a year's time, I'll be doing what I was built for:

Helping people.
3:37 am
It's my second to last day on the job, and I need to go. I have nothing to do, but a TON of shit that I could be doing if I wasn't here. Arg. I'm thinking that I'm going to take a half day tomorrow. I mean, really. What the fuck am I going to do at 3PM on a Friday that happens to be my last day? Not a fucking thing, that's what.

What else? Women piss me the fuck off. I don't really have the energy to get into it, but I'll give it a shot.
Friday, May 5th, 2006
10:48 am - Dates
I love going on dates. I like the idea of sweeping a woman off of her feet. It usually doesn't happen that way, of course. See The Smore's Incedent.  

Pugs and Drugs
 12PM: Philaldephia Pug Club meeting at Fairmount Park
Imagine 150 fat ugly pugs running around the park being fat and ugly. Adorable.

2PM: A picnic. Wine. Possibly some pot.

4PM: Kite flying with a fishing pole. If you've never done this, it's totally awesome. You can let the kite go up to the freaking STRATUSPHERE, and the pole let's you do all kinds of cool swoops and whatnot.

Demerol and Sailing

7PM: Every Saturday over the summer, Citysail  offers a 2 hour cruise aboard this 75 foot sailboat. You get to drink wine and watch the sun set on the Delaware river, and it's only $25 per person. I'm not even going to combine this one with anything else, because it's so freaking awesome. The only thing that could ruin it would be rain or seasickness, but you can plan for that stuff. 

Friday at the Zoo
1PM: We go to the zoo.  The zoo is awesome.  Monkeys and giraffes and whatnot.  There's even a hot air balloon that takes you up 400 feet in the air.  You can see the whole ugly ass city from up there.  And most of Jersey.  Gross! 

5PM: Dimitri's.  Best seafood in the city.   Friday is the day to go, because you can get fish that was alive and swimming hours before you eat it.  It's a cute little BYOB with really nice outside seating.  It's just far enough away from the Italian market to not be nuts, but close enough so that the people watching is outstanding. 
Third Date: Rockets
The idea of building and launcing model rockets with a girl is really sexy.  Probably because of the completely not-subtle symbolism.  And because I'm totally in love with Carrie from Mythbusters.   But also because, believe it or not, model rockets are kind of exciting.  Think about it, you work together with someone to put something together, then you get to LAUNCH the fucker hundreds of feet in the air.  How hot is that?  Sure, it's a little juvenile, and most adults aren't into model rockets (INcluding me, by the way.  I've built 2 model rockets in my lifetime.)  But I think it would be something simple and different.  And it would be a good way to gauge how you work together with a the person.  THis isn't a good first or second date, but maybe a mid-week third date. 
Budget Massage
Ok, there's this Massage School downtown, and you can get newly graduated students to give you hour-long massages for like, $20.  I've had $60 half hour massages, and I can't tell the difference, really.  Sure, watching the girl your dating getting her upper thighs rubbed by some huge guy named Dominick isn't the most relaxing thing, but I'd get over it.  This is for a girl you've been dating for a while.  Preferrably, one you've been sleeping with regularly.  Otherwise, it's sleezy.  (It might be sleezy anyway, but hey, I'm a little sleezy.  Deal with it.)  
I'm thinking a light dinner, strong martinis, and jealousy fueled marathon sex would be a proper end to the evening.   

Ok, I have a few more of them, but I've got to get to lunch. 

Tuesday, May 2nd, 2006
9:53 am - Dormitory
I moved into my room yesterday. After a brief panic attack spurred by the fact that I'm living in a dorm at the ripe age of 26, I settled in rather nicely. The room is big, the bed is comfy, and I get my own bathroom. It rocks. There's a handicapped shower stall, so it has a seat. It would be a real shame if I didn't get to have sex in that shower.

Harcum's cool. It's unpretentious. Being an RA over the summer is supposed to be pretty easy, so I'm looking forward to that.

Breakfast sucks. I went to the dining hall at around 8:30 and the place was EMPTY. Kind of strange. Here is a list of what was offered for breakfast:

1. Yogurt
2. Grapefruit (old)
3. bacon (looked a lot like scabs.)
4. Frozen waffles.
5. Tater tots.

You could also get omlettes. You had a choice of an omlette with cheese, scab-bacon, or BOTH cheese and scab-bacon. No veggies.

I heard that lunch and dinner are better. I hope so, or I'm going to starve.
Tuesday, April 25th, 2006
1:07 pm - urg
Whew, ok.

I went to work last night, and caught hell from everyone for my building repelling stunt. It was stupid, I admitted that much. I promised never to do it again, and I was forgiven. I love Trader Joe's.

I couldn't sleep last night. I feel like I'm fighting a cold. The whole gross ass laundry list: post nasal drip, clogged sinuses, nose stuffed as FUCK. I'm taking Sudifed and stuff, but it's not helping that much. I can't afford to get sick. I'm too fucking busy!

I've got an RA meeting tonight. Then I'm 'on duty' with another RA until midnight. That SUCKS, right? I think I have to sit at the fucking front desk all night and check people in, too. I'm not sure, but I think so.... That's going to drive me nuts, yo! I thought initially that they had security check people in, and it was my job to do rounds and whatnot. Eh, we shall see....

What else? I wrote Suzy's number down incorrectly. So, I can't get a hold of her. I want to go to Dmitri's in Queen's Villiage with her and Aaron and Lauren on Saturday. I hope she likes seafood. I can't date another seafood hater.
Sunday, April 23rd, 2006
9:55 pm - The dumbest thing I've ever done.
Ok, so last night. Full of whiskey and hormones, Suzy and I were groping each other on the 4th floor balcony. It's kind of like a fire escape without the stairs. Anyway, the door shuts behind us and locks, trapping us out there. Fuck. So I did the stupidest thing of my adult life: I climbed from the 4th floor balcony down to the balcony on the third floor, second floor, etc. It's a lot scarier than it sounds. Especially when you're drunk. Anyway, when I reached the ground I ran around the front of the building, climbed the stairs the the fourth floor, and opened the door to the balcony. I expected her to swoon at my bravery, or hit me for doing something so stupid. Instead she was like: "I found my cell phone. It was in my back pocket." She was totally unimpressed.

I think I'm going to like her.
8:25 pm - makeout party

There was much making out this weekend.  You should probably take my word for it.  

Thursday, April 13th, 2006
10:08 pm - Bad Sex.
I went to the bar with Bethany and her friends this afternoon. We got nice and afternoon shitfaced. I don't want to judge anyone, but those girls are sluts. Really. They sleep with a lot of dudes. Which is fine and all, I just ended up arguing with their drunk asses about it for a good long time.

In my opinion, drunken anonymous sex is very very rarely good sex. Maybe I'm doing something wrong, but 90% of the anonymous sex I've had has been either laughably bad or SERIOUSLY bad. The rest has been merely mediocre. These girls were all about sleeping with drunk dudes. Ew, right? Drunk girls are not that attractive, and drunk DUDES are usually fucking DISGUSTING. What the fuck? THen there's the whole other level of danger for women to consider. Maybe that's part of what makes it so attractive? Doubtful.

They're justification was: I'm going to go home and masturbate, or I'm going to find a guy to fuck. I'd rather get fucked. Yeah, me too. My point is that I'd rather fuck a girl that I feel a connection with 100 times than fuck 100 random drunk chicks one time. After I said that, one of the guys at the bar who had been listening looked at me like I was a freak. And maybe I am. I dunno. I think that sex (good sex, at least) is more than just a biological connection. I have a problem using girls as a scratching post. Even girls that WANT to be used as a scratching post. I also think that I have a responsibility to all of the women in my past and in my future that I don't turn sex some paltry, selfish act. If you do that enough, maybe sex permenantly becomes more about yourself than about the connection between you and the other person. And if THAT'S how you feel about sex, doesn't sex start to very closely resemble masturbation? And isn't that a sad, lonely existance...

Then again, maybe I'm taking sex too seriously. Hmm.
1:18 pm - I got it
I'm officially a Resident Assistant at Harcum. w00t and soforth.

I'm giving notice tomorrow. That should be fun.

Whew! I'm so relieived. I can't wait to get some sleep!
Wednesday, April 12th, 2006
1:55 pm - hmmm
Still waiting on Harcum to call me. I'm losing patience. I keep telling myself that it would be HIGHLY irregular if I wasn't hired for this job, but worrying about it won't make the call come any faster and that I should just relax. But still. There is a LOT riding on this, and the not knowing is going to drive me BUGSHIT.

If I'm an RA, I don't have to worry about rent, bills, or food for an entire year. I can focus on school, and I only have to work enough for walking-around money. If I DON'T get this R.A. position, I have to keep my stressful job at Haverford, I have to keep living in squalor, and i have to keep worrying about how I'm going to pay for it all. I'll also have to quit Trader Joe's, which is just to depressing to even think about.

I think i have an overuse injury in my back/abdomen/groin. THis is familiar to how I hurt myself during my Villanova Conference Services summer. My lower back hurts and my left side hurts and my left groin hurts. Wee!

I've got to work tonight, but I need to take it easy in the cold box. No feats of strength for me tonight.

These fucks need to call me.
Tuesday, April 11th, 2006
12:05 pm - stock
On another note:

Apparently, my sex-appeal has increased drastically with the season. Chrysty had an emergency and had to bail on me on Saturday, but she's definately interested. I know this because I'm good friends with her friend Bethany, and Bethany has a big mouth and tells me EVERYTHING Chrysty says about me.

Also, I got hit on about 4 times at TJ's this weekend. It must be my new pants. I was too stupid to do anything about it the first 3 times, and the girls Mom was there the last time so put on the brakes but still. The fact that my co-workers kept coming up to me and being like: That blonde was eyeing you like you were a snow cone in July. I was all like: Buh? Word? Neat. I can NEVER tell if a girl is into me or not, and I have absolutely no game AT ALL. Most of my relationships began with the girl grabbing my junk and saying: You're coming with me into the driveway and we're gonna make out. Move it. Yes, ma'am!

Also, my TJ's coworkers are all trying to set me up with their friends, which is totally awesome. Far and away, the best way to get a date is to go through friends. They're like an automatic freak filter, and matchmaking is fun as HELL (until it ends disasterously). There's a party the week after next in West Philly, where I'm supposed to sweep this one gal off her feet, and my buddy David wants to set me up with the 20 year-old lab assistant. The last 20 year old was hella lame, (smore's incident) but I'm willing to try again.

Yay for Spring. Biology is fun!
11:48 am - Nerves
I haven't heard from Harcum about the RA thing. They interviewed everyone last week, and they said they'd get back to us sometime this week. It's only Tuesday, but in my experience, you call your shoe-in candidates first, then you call the rejects and give them the bad news.

I still fairly certain that I'm going to get the job, but I'm pretty much going to worry about this until I hear from them. That's just the way I am. I keep going over the interview, thinking of better answers to the questions they asked. But damn. If you were in charge of the safety of a bunch of rowdy 18 year olds, would you rather have a 20 year-old watch them, or a 27 year old? Also, the fact that the Director of Resident's Life was like: "There is a possibility that you, as a non-traditional (read: older) student, would be offered responsibilities and perks above that of the regular RA's. Like an apartment instead of a dorm." Why would she even SAY something like that if she wasn't fairly sure that she was going to hire me? That would be like telling someone: "You're an over-qualified candidate for this job, so if we were to hire you, we'd give you more responsibilities and a little more money. But instead of hiring you, we're going to get someone who isn't as qualified to fill the spot." That's just dumb, right?


I feel like I've spent the past 3 months just waiting for shit to happen. I need action, people. Action!
Tuesday, April 4th, 2006
6:41 pm - Best Tuesday EVAR.
Ok, so. The interview went well. I sort of blanked on one question, but the rest were fine. I also looked great. I think I'll get it, and the job doens't seem like a huge time commitment. I'll be 'on duty' 2 nights a week, then one weekend from (Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights) every six weeks. My weekend clinical will suck when I'm on duty, but it's only twice a semester. The bad news is that apparently Harcum is full of thugs. The head of Res Life told me to expect threats. She also used the phrase: Snitches get stitches to describe the attitude of some of the students. Yikes. I'm a little nervous about the whole thing, but I'll manage. It's not like I'm trying to be best buddies with any of the students, and I can put myself in the mindset where threats and insults don't bother me. I'm sure that most of the kids are totally cool. She alluded to the possiblility of setting me up in an apartment rather than a dorm room, since I'm a 'non-traditional student'. Fucking radical.

Also: I asked Chrysty to go to lunch with me on Saturday, and she said yes. I rule. I just found out that the place I asked her out to is a little up-scale, which is fine, it just might be a bit of an overkill for a first date. I don't want to go over the top and make the smore's mistake again. It's not the expense as much as it's the ambiance. She's a something of a counterculture girl, and I don't want her to be uncomfortable. Please advise...

Also: I got a new pair of jeans today. I went down 2 inches in my waist and my ass looks freaking nice in them. (Gay!)

That's all.
9:12 am - R.A.
I've got my R.A. interview today.

Wish me luck.
Monday, April 3rd, 2006
11:19 am - riot.
Last night was fucking NUTS.

I arrived at Silk at 9:30. I hugged my sister, then checked out the bar. My mom, dad, and two of my aunts were sitting there. I almost died. My parents have been divorced for almost 15 years, but they're cool with each other. I sat and drank with them for a while. Bethany showed up soon after and we started in with the Pabst and shots of Old Crow.

I saw this girl Liz that I used to hang out with in high school. She's crazy. We danced a bit. I met Chrysty. She's adorable. We got drunk on Pabst and gutrot whiskey, then we danced. Around midnight the place EXPLODED. There was beer spraying everywhere, and you could barely move on the dancefloor. A scuffle broke out and I got thrown into a bar table. I didn't stop laughing, even as I picked glass from my elbow and tore a strip of cloth from my shirt to stop the blood. It sounds scary, but it wasn't. Our booze-addled brains were connecting danger with sex instead of fear. Kelly Clarkson's Since You've Been Gone came on and everyone started hopping around and hugging each other. If you want to see a room full of 300 drunk hipsters freak right the fuck out, play that song.

But I digress: At the end of the night, Chrysty told me to get her number from Bethany and call her. I rule.
Sunday, April 2nd, 2006
8:35 pm
I'm off to shake my ass at Silk City. It's my brother and sister's last night spinning there, so I'm going to see them off. It'll be funonabun.

Bethany's friend Chrysty (actual name and proper spelling, not hipster reinvention) is going to be there. I told Bethany that I thought Chrysty looked cute in her myspace pics, so now we're supposed to fall in love or something. I'll keep everyone abreast of the situation.

THere's this weird kid who works at TJ's with me who I think has a crush on me or something. He's got a girlfriend, but the word is that when he gets drunk he displays some very gay behavior. Anyway, the guy like's to touch me. It skeeves me. I'm not a touch freak or anything, far from it. I don't get weirded out by normal guy contact or anything, and I'm the huggiest guy out there, but I don't like this kid. He actually came up to me while I was sitting in the breakroom and CUPPED MY BOOB. I was like: "The FUCK'S wrong with you, boy?" I ended up just laughing it off, but still. Since then, he'll goose me when he passes me at the register and shit. He'll try to give me side noogies and whatnot. It's fucked up. And I've told him flat out that I don't want him touching me. And the thing is, I don't want to make a big deal out of it. I don't want any drama over stupid shit like this, and when he's not near me, I can laugh with him and talk to him and shit. Today I was like: Brendan, seriously: do you know what it would look like if a GUY filed a sexual harrassment complaint against you? Not good, kid.

I hope i don't have to pound his ass.

Anyway, I'm off to do some very herterosexual ass shaking at the club.

Thursday, March 30th, 2006
10:08 pm
What a fucking day.

First the good news: I got in the 98th percentile on the entrance exam. Harcum has absolutely no reason to not admit me into this program. All I have to do now is wait for the word, then it's all Financial Aid headaches.

The bad news: my boss and I had a talk today. He was upset about my 'performance'. I pretty much told him that he's not going to get any more out of me performance-wise. I told him that in the year to follow, I'm going to be way too busy with school to worry about a job that pays me barely 15K a year after taxes. I told him that I didn't like the job, that I didn't think I was good at the job, and that showing up every day and working in a job that I didn't like, I was terrible at, and that didn't pay a lot of money was pretty dumb. (Of course, I was more couth than all that.) I essentially told him what he already knew: I'm a terrible accountant. If he wants a good accountant, he needs to find someone else, and pay them what they're worth. He agreed. We promised not to leave each other in a lurch, but it looks like that job and I are getting ready to part ways. And good riddance. I like Sam, though. For all his faults, he's really looked out for me these past couple of years. I'll still visit when I go.

The thing is, it's kind of VITAL that i land the R.A. job. I've got the interview on tuesday. I'm going suit shopping this weekend. Wish me luck, ya'll.
9:46 am - Busy
I had the R.A. meeting last night. It went well, as expected. I was the ONLY WHITE DUDE THERE, which I thought was awesome. Everyone was like: what's this old cracker doing here? After about 10 minutes I won most of them over. I'm a pretty charismatic guy.

Me and the other applicants did some team-building exercises that I think went really well. Most of the stuff was old hat, since City Year was like a YEAR of team building. The staff watched and took notes during the exercises. I heard one of the guys say something like: That Scott guy is good. So, that's a good sign. I have an interview next week, then I'll know whether or not I'm in the week after that.

ONe thing that pissed me off: as everyone was leaving the meeting, I found a phone on the floor. Now, picture this. 30 people are all filing out of a room and headed for points unknown. I found a phone on the FLOOR where someone could STEP on it and break it. My natural reaction was to pick it up and call out: Whose phone is this? Some 9 foot-tall basketball hero looking guy snatches it away from me, gets in my space and says: Fuck, Dude, you're trippin'. I'm all like: WTF? So I say to him: Dude, that phone was on the floor, and I was trying to find out whose it was. The correct thing to say is 'Thank you.' He was all like: You did't need to yell out and wave the phone in the air like you did. Talk about things that are just not worth arguing about, right? And this kid is applying to be an R.A.! Are you fucking kidding me?!?! I just walked away.

I've talked it over with some people, and my friend Reece said that the guy was intimidated because I really seemed to make an impression on the people. Like: Great, here's another white guy that's going to overshadow me'. I can understand why that would get on someone's nerves, but he delt with it in the worst possible way. I mean, the Resident's Life staff was in there watching this guy. Or maybe the dude was just an asshole. Either way, if I end up having to work with him, there's going to be an altercation. Ah, well. It's been a while since I've had my ass kicked for me...

In other news: I have a cavity. Fuck a Duck.

In other-other news: I'm taking the Nurse SAT test thingy today. I'm going win that test's heart. I'm going to take that test to the Aquaruim, then out for a nice dinner at the Standard Tap, then dancing until 3AM. The test will have a bit too much to drink, so it will sleep over at my apartment. I will give that test a pair of my boxers and one of my t-shirts to wear while sleeping. After a strictly PG-13 Rated makout session, the test will fall asleep with it's head on my chest. The next morning, I will take the test out for breakfast at the local diner. When I drop the test off at it's house, it will say: That was one of the funnest nights of my life.. I will promise to call the test later on in the evening. Then the test will tell all of it's friends about how wonderful I am, and write about me in it's Livejournal.

I am going to make that test fall in love with me.
Monday, March 27th, 2006
2:34 pm - The Residents
I stopped by Harcum today and picked up an R.A. application. I met most of the Student Life people, and of course they love me. I'm kind of lucky that way. People seem to like me instantly, which is pretty cool. But I digress....

I banged out the application and essays at work and dropped it back off. I need to get two references, which shouldn't be that hard. I've got a meeting on Wednesday that I need to finagle with TJ's, but if I tell them it will improve my chances of staying on, they'll work with me.

Last night was a BLAST, by the way. A lot of people showed up, and we had a lot of fun. Bre went to West Virginia today. I'm gonna miss her, but she's going to have so much fun.

What else? My friggin back hurts. It's gorgeous outside. I feel GREAT, which is a new thing. I think I finally kicked my cold out on it's arse.

I hope everyone is doing well. You're all very good looking, charming people, and one day a rock band will write songs about you.
Saturday, March 25th, 2006
7:33 pm - Jobs.
Ah, shit.

It's the job thing again.

I really like Trader Joe's. I mean, I've had a dozen jobs in my life, and TJ's is far and away my favorite out of all of them. I don't want to quit. But they pay shit. I could concievably survive off of what I make there, but it wouldn't be fun. I detest being poor.
However, I was poor in Boston when I worked for City Year, and I loved it. Probably because I loved that job....

About Haverford: since hearing that I'm leaving TJ's, my boss has been a total dick. I think he was worried that I was going to quit when I started at TJ's, but now that he know's I'm leaving there, he has free reign to be an asshole again. Ok, ok. He's not THAT bad. However, it does seem like every 2 or 3 months he turns into a huge bully. And there's nothing I can say, because the guy has NEVER been wrong in his life. I don't know.

The main thing is that I don't like the Haverford job. I'm NO GOOD at the Haverford job either. How do I know this? Well, I haven't recieved ONE WORD of praise from my boss in the two-plus years that I've worked there. And I know that I'm not good at it, because I just know. I'm not build for desk-jobs. I'm not an accountant. I'm not particularly organized, or detail-oriented, or into crunching numbers. The talents I possess are wasted there, and in some cases, my talents are an actual HINDERANCE to my work performance. (My boss would like for me to be more of a dick to people. I don't understand it either...)

My relationship with my boss is shitty, too. When he's in a bad mood, he makes me feel like shit. Not because of anything I've done, but because he feels like it. It's degrading as hell, and I'm sick of it. To be fair, he doesn't do this all the time. But when he does, it's really horrible. He's a bully, and I know what to do with bullies. You stand up to them, right Ece? Well, if I stand up to Sam, I'll have to leave. Either he'll fire me, or I'll have to quit. The question I have to ask myself is: Is my pride worth being poor again, during a really sensitive time in my career? Nursing School starts in 6 weeks.

Do I really want to be worrying about paying rent on top of all the other stuff I'll have to deal with?
Another way to look at it is: Do I really need the added stress of dealing with my boss when I'm already stressed out with school?

Here's another wrinkle that could concievable solve my problems: I might be able to become a Resident Assistant at Harcum. I'd get free room and board, plus a shitty stipend. I could keep working at least 2 days a week at TJ's, and I wouldn't have to worry about paying rent or bills. Being an RA is a little time-intensive, but the R.A.'s I knew in college certainly didn't sweat it.

I need to see if I'm eligible for it, and there's a good chance that I'm too late to apply, but there might be some strings I can pull. I mean, I'd be the PERFECT candidate for an R.A. I'm 26 years old for fuck's sake!

Even if I can't pull off the RA thing, I still might quit Haverford. I must really hate it if I'm considering taking a 33% pay cut. Damn.
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